Seriously?

I’m kind of at my wit’s end with my health care providers today. Not necessarily the doctors, but the idiots who run the customer services units leave a lot to be desired.

My MRI was rescheduled because I had to have a pre-authorization for the scan. OK, no problem. Never had to have a pre-auth for ANYTHING with BlueCross before, but my provider changed from Empire Blue Cross to Anthem Blue Cross this year when I moved to Delaware, so that could be why. So, I rescheduled my MRI for this Tuesday, called my ortho’s office, made sure they had my NEW insurance information, and asked them to take care of it. Those guys are fantastic.

An hour or so ago, during my work day, where I am on the phone 90% of the time, my cell phone rings with a number I don’t know. I was on a conference call so I let it go to voice mail. I had an automated message with someone who gave me this number and asked me to call them back regarding my Health Plan. WTF? Who are you? So when I finally had some time with my lunch I call them back. This girl answers, does NOT identify who she is working with, and I tell her that I got a message and was asked to call back. She says, “Ok.” Then proceeds to ask me for my date of birth and social security number. Uh, no. I said, “I’m not going to give you that…I don’t know who you are.” She says, “You called us.” I said, “No, I returned YOUR call.” Oh – well we’re Anthem Blue Cross. Then why didn’t you answer the freaking PHONE that way?

So I give them the information they referenced and they let me know that my MRI had been authorized. Then she goes on to tell me she wants to help me schedule it. Uh, no. It’s already scheduled. She says, “Well, I can save you some money.” Ok. Then she says, “We want you to have the MRI done at Upper Chesapeake Facility in Bel Air, MD…it will save you $15 on the total cost of the MRI.” Uh, no. Nope. NO. I said, “Why would I want to drive an 80 mile round trip which will cost me $40 in gas to save $15 on my MRI?” Well, this facility will cost you less.

No…no it won’t. It will cost me more, and I can’t charge my GAS to my flex account for medical expenses. I asked her if there was a problem with the facility I had chosen (which is a MILE from my house). No…but it will cost you $15 to $20 more to have it there.

I lost my sh*t. See, I had already been on a call this morning with Express Scripts to find out why in the h-e-double-hockey-sticks they don’t give me a full month script on my anti-anxiety meds. I take 3-a-day. 3-a-day for 30 days is 90 pills. EASY MATH. So why do they proceed to send me 20 every month and then tell me that I can’t get them refilled until the next month? The girl I spoke to there was a moron too. I asked her to READ the SCRIPT from the doctor. OH…well, you should be getting 90 pills. YOU THINK?

Sigh.

So back to Little Miss Anthem….who tells me in the FUTURE I should order my procedures though them.

NO – if I have determined that the facility I’m using is IN NETWORK, then I’m going to make the most convenient appointment for me. NOT FOR YOU. She tells me, “Well, your doctor is in MD.” Yeah, because he’s the BEST. And the ONLY doctor who will do this surgery in the Mid-Atlantic area. I also tell her, “My knee hurts. I need surgery. The only way you people will pay for the surgery is if I go to PT which is making my knee WORSE and then having an MRI…I’m following your rules. I pay a lot on a monthly basis for you people to WORK FOR ME.” Then I hung up.

Yup, lost my sh*t.

It’s a good thing I didn’t have to deal with this during cancer treatments. Because I think I would have elected to just stand in front of a microwave and hope the radiation worked.

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