Wigging Out – Just a Little

Last summer, when my symptoms first presented, I felt like shit. No other nice way to put that, except all out shit. I was sick as a dog, no energy, and swollen. Swollen like nobody’s business. Probably because 16 out of 21 lymph nodes were involved with cancer.

The past couple of days, although I’ve been feeling fine (except a little tired), my hands and feet have been swelling. Not to the degree they were last year, but enough to prompt me to call my oncologist.

Dr. Rao is awesome. I’m sure he hears from people all the time with that same, “I’m totally frigging wigged out by trying to appear calm” phone voice. I was hoping he’d say, “Oh, it’s nothing. Probably high blood pressure or something else.” But my BP is normal. I limit my salt. I got no reason to be swollen other than cancer or my ticker. I’d like to rule out the cancer first. And Dr. Rao agreed.

So Monday, I have to haul my cookies down to Baltimore so he can check me out. He said, “I’m sure its nothing but I’d rather be safe than sorry.” Yeah, me too. Not gonna lie – freaking out, just a little.

No whammies. No whammies. NO WHAMMIES.

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6 thoughts on “Wigging Out – Just a Little

  1. We are always going to feel like that. The totally shit side of having cancer – What’s that symptom? Has it come back? Is this the start of the next stage? Every twinge… the worry is natural.
    But you’re going to be fine. Try not to worry. You are going to be FINE!

    • Sigh – My head knows that it’s probably nothing. But there’s a little voice screaming, “What if it’s back?” and that scares the bejeebers out of I’m trying to keep calm. ugh.

  2. With the weather we’ve been having and the stress you’ve been under? You’re fine…just 40, hon. Now think happy thoughts. Like wth color I’mma paint mah kitchen. I’m thinking a very pale yellow.

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