Feeling A Bit Scattered

Our impending move seems to be growing weeks closer by the day.

And I’m still nervous. I know it’s the right thing to do for the family, but preparing to leave this house – where I have lived for the past 12 years – all alone and empty, well, it is a bit nerve-racking. And the thought of a huge commute until I can find a job in Delaware isn’t making that any easier.

I was at least comforted by a couple of things this week –

1) I was offered a job with AFLAC. As an account manager. Which is great, because I could have worked out of the Delaware office. BUT it is 100% commission and I’m not wired for that. We need a stable base salary and good benefits, which I currently have. They told me I could have continued by current position while working with AFLAC, but I just don’t see how. So I passed. However, they have Bob’s resume and he has an interview with them tomorrow. He can do 100% commission and could sell hot chocolate in hell, so fingers crossed that we’re able to take this on for him until he can find something more steady. Or, if not steady, until we can save up enough to put a down payment on a new house in Delaware (if we end up moving out of my Mom’s).

2) I gifted a friend with a huge stash of yarn. I needed to pare down in light of our upcoming move, and she uses the acrylic yarn for stuff for her boys because they are, well, boys. And boys are messy.

3) An article in the paper this morning says that houses going up on the market in our area don’t stay on the market long. We are not going to put this house on the market until the first of next year. We have things we know we need to do to it first – new roof, some remodel to the bath room, replacing some doors, and painting mostly. That won’t happen until Bob gets a job so we can start putting some cash away.

4) Since we’ve decided NOT to sell right away, and have also decided against renting (too many “what ifs” with renting) – we don’t have to worry about a storage facility for a while. Avoiding an extra expense is muy bueno.

5) I had a date with my husband yesterday. We went to an antique store in Havre de Grace and then had lunch and the local Irish Pub. Of course, it made my sensitive stomach a bit queasy, but the date part was nice.

Still I have so much to do. I’m planning for a huge yard/moving sale next month. I need to go through every room and determine what stays and what goes (into the yard sale) – and then on top of that, what can be donated and what needs to be tossed. I’m slowly getting through it. But I have to go back to work in a week. And I’m feeling a bit of pressure because just about every single weekend between now and my mom’s surgery is booked with activities. Yikes. The first week in May is coming up on us pretty quick pretty fast.

In other news, I’m finally starting to get a little energy back (phew). Not a lot, but some. I’m feeling better from my virus. My joint pain hasn’t gotten any better, and lord only knows when my hair will make a return, but I am feeling better. I have had some issues with the female bits though. No worries – all is fine – but when you have a hysterectomy, followed by 6 chemo sessions, 25 radiation sessions, and 3 brachytherapy sessions, you get scar tissue in the vagina. And it shrinks. A lot. My last pelvic was extremely painful and I tore. I have been given a vaginal dialator, which I am supposed to use every day, but sadly, it is too big. I have also been told that I can have regular “relations” which sounds exciting, but my libido is in the toilet and I’m scared of the pain. It hurt like HELL the last time we did, which was too long ago for me to even count. So, hmmm. I’ll be having a vaginal exam every time I go to the doctor from now on (it’s the best way to check to see if the cancer comes back) and I need to stretch so that I can have more comfortable exams, and well, I’d like to get back to some regular form of lovings with my honey. So, I’m trying to work through all that.

Well, I suppose I have wasted enough time on the old pc. I need to get back to going through stuff. Today is book shelves. Yay. And then, I’m sitting down with my Kindle to read some more of Marilyn Monroe’s Red Diary. Everything I’ve read about it said it was faked, but it’s still an interesting read.

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