Freaking the Hell Out

Last Wednesday, in addition to my regular radiation appointment, I also had an appointment in the afternoon to see my oncologist’s office.  My regular oncologist, Dr. Rao, was out of the country, but I did see Beth, his NP.  During her regular exam, Beth found a little nodule in my groin on the left side.  It was sore to touch, and definitely swollen.

Shit.

Shit shit shit.

Beth said she didn’t think it was a lymph node, it was too high.  I have had two heart catheterizations, so it could be old scar tissue, but to be on the safe side, she wanted Dr. Sharma (my radiation oncologist) to check it out.

That night, I also had some pains in my abdomen, on the left side.

SHIT

So, on Thursday, I told my radiation tech, and she told Dr. Sharma, who decided he did want to see me.  He felt the nodule, and pressed on my abdomen (ouch).  And promptly ordered a CT Scan and requested a stool sample.  He thinks I may have a bowel infection, and he’s not sure what the nodule is, but wants to check it out because my cancer was agressive.

No one wants to hear “cancer” and “agressive” in the same sentence when they are talking about YOU.

So, I didn’t have radiation on Friday.  Instead, I had a CT Scan.

And the waiting is killing me.

KILLING ME.

Say some good thoughs, mmmkay?

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